a twist in my story.
Just some plant-named loser who spends far too much time online.

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Anonymous asked: uncle howie's watchin you


Answer:

Anonymous asked: I'm at work and I'm about to cry. I don't want to cry, can you say something funny?


Answer:

xekstrin:

mylife-beliike:

i-do-it-for-the-lesbians:

ONE TIME AT SCHOOL LET ME REMIND YOU I GO TO AN ALL GIRLS CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL SO THEY ALL WEAR SHOIRT ASS SKIRTS OKAY SO ONE TIME THIS GIRL LIKE TRIPPED AND HER SKIRT FLEW UP AND MY FRIEND WAS LIKE TIFFANH GO FUCKING HELP HER UP AND I WAS LIKE PARALYZED STARING AT HER ASS AND THEN MY FRIEND WAS LIKE FUCKING SHIT TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN AND SHE LITERALLY HIT ME WITH A BIBLE AND I HAVE NO REGRETS NONE

This kills me every time

"TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN"

yourekellinmeinagoodway:

penceyprepofficial:

I DON’T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL ANYMORE I WANT TO BE 23 AND BE IN SOME ANGRY GIRL ROCK BAND AND BE ON WARPED TOUR AND WEAR THE SAME SHIRT FOR A WEEK AND CHANGE KIDS LIVES AND WRITE MEANINGFUL LYRICS AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD

But nobody likes you when you’re 23

spainsasscheeks:

ya seem thirsty haru

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real thirsty

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gilinskytbh:

baesicdallas:

So there’s this place in New South Wales called Yass and there is a mcdonalds there and well…..

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"my ass"

open 24 hours

(via schwarbagetruck)

skarchomp:

When you and your friend pull off a sick burn

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(via golden-pantaloons)

shrek's kid:dad... i'm... i'm gay
shrek:well, better out than in, i always say, eh? heheheheh someBODY ONCE
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